1. Good gracious, it’s 2014, there should be some sort of service I can call and say, “Yes hello, I am unable to leave my bathroom floor because I am so sick, would you be a dear and bring me a fizzy drink and some pepto? Thaaaaanks!”

  2. oh my god I’m dying. Why is this happening? I hate being ill. 

    WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME, O DEITY WHOSE EXISTENCE I DOUBT?

    Eff this, I’m getting a weirwood. 

A most excellent adventure

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